Feeling Inadequate? Marketing is doing its job

Taken February 21, 2022

Experiencing a sense of inadequacy is a pervasive trend across various age groups. I recall feeling perplexed in high school while watching my favorite stand-up comedian, Louis C.K., discuss how "life is shit wall to wall." He wasn't the sole individual expressing such sentiments; my friends entering their thirties shared the same outlook, and those in their forties and beyond painted an even bleaker picture of life and the future. I pondered why my admired community held such contempt for life as they aged when, from my perspective, their lives seemed great. Placing these individuals on a pedestal, I wished only for a fraction of their success, but they almost convinced me they were a group of losers.

Curious yet apprehensive about their viewpoint, I began asking them probing questions: "What do you want your life to be like?", "Exactly what's wrong?", "What did you want to do?", and "What don't you like about yourselves?" (Admittedly, I have an issue with crossing boundaries.) Their responses were not extraordinary; mostly, they expressed desires like "I don't want to work anymore," "I need to get married," "I just want to travel," "I wish I was better looking," "I wish I was healthier," and, last but not least, "I'M GETTING OLD." While I'd like to provide a detailed summary of the individuals involved, privacy preservation dictates a vague description. These people are relatively successful and attractive by most standards, and they don't look that old to me.

Fortunate enough to be invited to their parties and engage in lengthy conversations, I noticed that every time they confessed to feeling inadequate, their comments centered on someone with an ideal lifestyle they envied. The "model" individuals they admired, who sometimes attended the same parties, were then asked the same questions. Their responses were almost identical, except they subjectively felt inadequate in different aspects. The cycle of inadequacy revolved around finances, relationships, beauty standards, and health. They perceived each other as overall better, even if the sentiment wasn't reciprocated.

Through diverse social interactions at various socioeconomic levels, I realized that almost everyone, irrespective of status, felt they weren't good enough. Strikingly, most were unaware that this thought process stemmed from insecurity. It's crucial to note that the values and insecurities discussed, relative to the general public, are often shallow, but discernment is necessary when comparing personal values.

Upon this realization, I attempted to explain the situation to my envious yet successful friends. While they temporarily agreed with my astute observation, expressing, "Oh my gooood, you're soo riiiggghhtt," they reverted to autopilot the next day, disregarding that moment of lucidity. They retained the same insecurities, and their general negative disposition toward life persisted. Reflecting on these interactions, I sought to identify the root cause of such pervasive low self-worth, particularly when related to only two attributes. After extensive research, the entity behind this issue appeared to reside within the advertisement and marketing world. The motives of advertisers, influencers, and companies aim to convince people to consume their products or services. Their methodology, preying on consumer fears and insecurities, contributes to the epidemic of mental illness by exploiting vulnerabilities to prompt impulsive decisions. The more their tactics are analyzed, the more connections to propaganda emerge.

Distinguishing between propaganda and advertisement, the former pushes a government's agenda, while the latter promotes a company's products or services. Propaganda is a form of brainwashing that might lead United States citizens to adopt values misaligned with its constitution. Marketing is a form of brainwashing that might lead a person to consume a product or service they might not need. The reason propaganda became illegal is its effectiveness. Some believe they are above being influenced, yet most inspirational messages emphasize the importance of surrounding oneself with better people because surrounding individuals influence who a person becomes. The same sentiment holds for the information and content people consume. Thirty daily experiences with a phone showing beauty standards comparable to Brad Pitt or Cara De Lavigne, compared to meeting normal-looking friends Sheldon and Rachel once a week, will likely lead to self-deprecation.

So, what's the ideal solution? Completely avoiding advertisements seems impractical, especially for those who morally should consume "free" forms of entertainment. Then, what is the realistic solution? It seems to be the methods used in therapy for individuals who coexist at home or the office despite not getting along. Radical acceptance and being mindful enough not to let marketing influence mood or self-worth are key. Also, it's okay to admire friends because they are amazing people, and they likely think the same of you. This solution may sound corny, but like most good things in life, it's not exciting; it's hard work, and thankfully, it's simple.